You are two weeks away from the big day. Marriage is around the corner and the move of you or your fiancé is unplanned, unorganized and could be unforgettable. What you need is a plan, strategic, organized, and adaptable. Sure you could wing it the day after you return from your honeymoon, but who is to say your favorite NFL team is not playing in the game of the year. Why not reveal your inhibitions, expose your fears, and deal with it now.
The first obstacle you need to deal with (unless the two of you will be buying a new house) one of you will be moving in with the other. Prepare to make room, prepare to share, this will be a new life you are chartering for yourself and your spouse. Keep an open mind to change, stay flexible for the unexpected. Do not get overwhelmed by the details, I am suggesting a plan, a blueprint for dealing with change and a view of how to overcome some potential obstacles.
You chose your mate, you fell in love with her tenderness, her charm, her compassion and her loyalty. Unfortunately, you did not choose her sofa, kitchen accessories, bed linens or her fifteen year collection of footwear. How you deal with your new acquisitions will determine how your spouse views you and how the two of you will deal with differences in the future.
You can expect to make room for new furniture. Now, in the event you are not ready to part with that dorm room sofa that holds so many memories, you might want to reach a higher level of understanding. Consider this an opportunity to educate yourself. It is quite possible that your new spouse has not traveled the western United States like yourself. She may not have the historical heritage to appreciate that stone you drug out of the
Colorado River and converted into a coffee table. Your historical premonitions are more than likely accurate but, leave room for the possibility that Lewis or Clark did not roll a wagon train over that very same stone in your living room. Prepare to appreciate the finely crafted, recently renovated antique about to descend into the middle of your living room. Relax it will not define your soul and your being. It will not be in your life forever, and your friends will not disown you. Think of it as exactly what it is, it is just an antique coffee table.
You can expect to receive an abundance of kitchen paraphernalia. Do not fret, most of the items you have never seen, will never use, and more than likely will not be able to pronounce the names or ever understand their use. Your diligence study and acquisition of the most powerful microwave known to man kind is an honorable achievement. Surely such an honor will be recognized in the future, but today make room for more important culinary pursuits. Bring on the colander, the turkey baster, the ten quart crock pot, and the clay baked garlic roaster. Open your arms and rejoice. Your need to try and educate yourself on the basics of what is necessary in the kitchen is over. Give in to your fate. Celebrate the days of accomplishments with your limited edition, titanium coated 1500 watt, semi-nuclear microwave. You have been replaced.
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You can expect to revamp, reorganize, and remodel your closet, and listen to your elders when they speak. If you are of sound mind and body, drop your disbelief and take yourself to the organizational section of the nearest building supply store. You have two choices at this point, fight the system or play the role of the white knight. I suggest the latter. In fact plan this one weeks in advance. I suggest you park the sports car, borrow your dads Ford F-150 and drag your best friend to personally move your future wife’s personal attire. Only through such and adventure will you gain the logic and compassion for how you need to reorganize your own basic clothing needs. A great deal of acceptance will be needed for this exercise. Accept the fact that your fiancé’ has garments for every season, shoes, belts, boots, boudoir items and accessories for only one reason, She Needs Them! Think of this as the opportunity you have been looking for to do that never the right time spring cleaning. Let go of the jeans with eight gashes in them. They will never hold the significance they did in the late 90’s. I have found it best to forgive the grandparents for the sweaters you will never wear. Surely you or your friends know of a needy couple struggling to raise a family. The items that you have not gotten around to wearing in three years will never be worn. Here are my three suggestions: Donate, Donate, Donate.
You can expect to loosen up on the Zen Standard Less is More approach to the bathroom. You will have to find alternative avenues to convey your spiritual connection to the Far East. It is understood that Dove has brought you this far and that you may not have a tremendous appreciation for facial cleansers, loofas, organic ginger based body creams or masks pulled from the creamy clay of Karachi. Your fiancé is in possession of these items for one reason only. She Needs Them! You did not mind them when her beauty fought through the fans at the Rolling Stones concert. Do not fight it now.
Remember you are bringing this joyous package of tenderness you will call your wife into your household and your future because she makes you better. She improves the way you approach life. She drives you to want more for yourself. She inspires you to perform. She allows you to slow down long enough to appreciate. So, while you are in a slow down mode, appreciate her. For the next year your middle name will be compromise. Be willing to embrace change and understand this beautiful woman is a blessing in your life.
Myles Castello
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